Winehouse, Ramsay and Lord Gobshot have Cosmetic Surgery
Amy Winehouse and her Tits
Amy Winehouse has had her boobs cosmetically altered. I learnt of this for the first time today – some time after she appeared with her new knockers on a BBC show called Strictly Come Dancing (sounds a bit shit, whatever it is).
It’s wonderful news. My life has taken on a [...]
Pregnancy, Sexual Relations and Auntie’s Advice
Bonking Advice from the BBC
During a futile search for something to whinge and moan about, I finally came across an article on the BBC’s website in their h2g2 section entitled:
How to Get Pregnant and How Not To .
It’s really quite brilliant – especially the Old Wives’ section. Take this for example:
If you believe you are pregnant, you shouldn’t pull [...]
Nick Griffin; Black Balled Or Black Balls?
What Nick Griffin Would Have Said…
I promised myself after watching Nick Griffin on last Thursday’s now infamous edition of BBC Question Time that I wouldn’t write about his and the BNP’s subsequent black-balling from the mainstream political arena on the same and only day he’d ever stepped into it. I’ve now broken that promise.
However, rather than [...]
BBC Watchdog Shits On The Box.
Shit on the Box – BBC Watchdog Yet Again!
In tonight’s enlightening programme (BBC 1, 7.30pm), Sir Cliff Richard wrote a letter to BBC Watchdog advising people not to buy tickets for his live concerts from ‘rip-off merchants’ or non-approved ticket agents. As tempting as it might be to buy your ‘dream ticket’ he said (who [...]
BBC Masterchef – Guilt and Remorse Reviled
Guilt and Remorse
I’ve been feeling the tiniest twinge of guilt over the last few days since I posted an article entitled BBC Masterchef – Masterchefs, Mastercunts and Minge Biscuits. In it, I referred to several things about Masterchef that makes me want to throw my colon up into a Pyrex bowl and force the producer’s [...]
BBC Masterchef – Masterchefs, Mastercunts and Minge Biscuits.
Become a Masterchef Mastercunt In Your Own Home
It’s Sunday lunch. You’ve taken your seats at the table, polished off your first drink, and you’re presented with your starter.
‘Mmm, it’s very nice’, says one diner.
‘Yeah, very nice’, says another.
Then you say ‘I like the lettuce. I like the prawns. I even like the Marie Rose sauce. [...]
BBC Watchdog Nike ‘Piss In Boots’ Fiasco
BBC Watchdog Uncovers Accusation Of Some Piss In Some Boots
Following what can only be described as the most tenacious under-cover investigation the UK has ever seen from a group of TV journalists, BBC Watchdog has found that a young boy’s Nike football boots were accused of smelling of cat piss.
Young Man Tormented By Accusations of [...]
London 2012 Olympic Games Opening Ceremony
LONDON 2012 OLYMPIC OPENING CEREMONY UNOFFICIAL SCHEDULE (PROVISIONAL)
Now that the Olympic flag has officially been handed over to London’s Mayor Boris Johnson in Beijing, Spitting Bullets is proud to announce its status as ‘Unofficial Organiser’ of London’s 2012 Olympic Games Opening Ceremony.
London’s bid to create a unique festival atmosphere in 2012 will surely be boosted [...]
Pizza Evolution from Pizza Hut – Get Stuffed!
UK Public told to ‘Unleash the Happiness’
Pizza Hut’s Recent Advertisements
I’m a little confused, because Pizza Hut are inviting people to ‘Unleash the Happiness’ by asking them to actually set foot inside one of their ‘restaurants’, which is unusual, because most people would be better of unleashing their happiness in bed with someone else or by [...]
Headache? – Try 32 Skinless Sausages Sir!
A strange thing keeps happening to me in my local supermarket when attempting to purchase paracetamol. At first glance, you may think that this is not the basis for an interesting story, but please, read on.
After carefully selecting several items of shopping a few days ago from the supermarket shelves, and after performing an [...]
